This is a good poem. I thought it really showed your voice clearly. But the opening was a little harsh and I myself hate the winter, but I still somewhat like it. The whole essence of the poem is good but maybe you could have used some more words or made it less dramatic. I can tell that you really hate the winter through reading this piece.
Ale, i really liked your poem and i hate the winter too. I like your analogy about the knife also. And since its a poem and puncuation doesn't have rules, You did a greAT job!
Alex, This was a good poem, although I was confused because Miss Duffy showed us something similar in class. At first glance, you just kind of made the other one rhyme. BUT it did have a lot of differences in it and with a little reviseing, it would be something very neat. Nice work.
This is a good poem. I thought it really showed your voice clearly. But the opening was a little harsh and I myself hate the winter, but I still somewhat like it. The whole essence of the poem is good but maybe you could have used some more words or made it less dramatic. I can tell that you really hate the winter through reading this piece.
ReplyDeleteAle, i really liked your poem and i hate the winter too. I like your analogy about the knife also. And since its a poem and puncuation doesn't have rules, You did a greAT job!
ReplyDeleteLines 5 and 6 seemed didn't seem to flow all that well, but I thought it was good. You can really tell that you don't like snow. Anyways, good job.
ReplyDeleteAlex, This was a good poem, although I was confused because Miss Duffy showed us something similar in class. At first glance, you just kind of made the other one rhyme. BUT it did have a lot of differences in it and with a little reviseing, it would be something very neat. Nice work.
ReplyDelete